Personal Development & Life Coaching

“You cannot teach a man anything, you can only help him find it within himself.” Galileo

Personal development and life coaching is a professional relationship dedicated to serve your long term development. 

It is conducted in a private environment to maximize trusts, insights and clarity. 

And after each session you will know what you need to do to move that much closer to where you want to be in alignment with your core values.

Coaching Plans & Pricing

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life coaching for you

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Do I really need a life coach?

Maybe you don’t understand why you feel the way you are feeling in spite of doing everything right. 

“Something just does not feel right” you whispered to yourself, lest anyone who overheard call you privileged and/or entitled. 

So you play the game of life eventhough you don’t see the point. You can’t be satisfied no matter how hard you try…

Yet you can't find a way out of it

Perhaps you are even diagnosed with one of them modern ‘mental illnesses’, destined to live a life of dependence on synthetic endocrine disruptors and all its side effects. 

But what can you do nowWhere do you want to put your life energy? 

When you have that sneaking suspicion that you are not doing what this gift is for, then underneath it all you are going to have unease, disquiet, and a yearning that pushes you all the time to find what is it that you are here to do?

“We can guide people to healing if we ask the right questions.” Dr. Gabor Maté

This existential dissonance is too painful. Therefore you take alcohol, and maybe some drugs to make the pain go away.

It makes the hopelessness and despair go away too, just for a while. But they always come back with a vengeance.

So we up the doses. Hence the cycle repeats itself while spiraling downward until you have little control over whatever chosen substances/habits that substituted the real (unmet) need.

Actually, it doesn’t have to be substances. It can also be the more culturally sanctioned rewards: acceptance, wealth, acquisition and power.

As a substitute in return they deplete your finite energy and precious time (aka life force).

Can those rewards fill that inner emptiness? They are merely a coping mechanism, much like any addictions: they provide temporary pain relief.

The question is: why the pain? And where does it come from?

 

 

“It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.” Jiddu Krishnamurti

If the conditions caused you to be miserable; is there something wrong with you, or the conditions?

Let’s presupposed for a moment: that a society as it is trained us to seek social acceptance and you’re not achieving success as has been defined for you, then you are by its definition a ‘failure’, which attached to our self-esteem.

Even if you know what you are doing is important and meaningful, it is still hard to escape the scrutiny of the society constantly imposing its expectations on us. 

“Oh you are 28, and you are still single?” “How much money do you make in a year again?” “Do you have many followers on your social?” “Oh she’s a doctor, just not the kind that save lives.”

“He has a husband? Wow…” “I bet she can’t fit into those jeans” “Did you go to university?” “What are you even good at?” “Oh I wish I have more free time like you…”

“We don’t need more people like you in our country!” “Your mother already had 2 children when she was your age”

So what you do? Compliance for social approval, or rebel and live with the dis-ease within?

Depression is a withdrawal from participation.

Is that bad? It depends on participate in ‘what’?

Conventional mental health care system is there to help you to become a functional member of the society as it is, and if society as it is needs to change; as a result then the mental health care system isn’t going to align with what caused your ‘dis-ease’ in the first place.

On the contrary, it is in its interest to keep you there. 

Certainly on one level, if you are just a cog in a machine, replaceable by somebody else; you’re going to feel not needed. 

What if you just don’t see any meanings in participation?

Maybe you feel a deep wrongness with the way the system functions right now.

It could be that you feel cheated as you’ve achieved success by societal standard yet you still feel empty, unhappy and lost? Perhaps your heart knows something your head doesn’t. 

In which case then: withholding serotonin is your soul’s silent rebellion against that very misalignment..

Life Coaching can help

“Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books that are now written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer.” says Rainer Maria Rilke

On a deeper level, we have a need to feel useful. A need to do more with your life instead of just being secure. We need to contribute to something that is beautiful to us, that we care about for real.

For reasons beyond your control, you find yourself not feeling needed or useful.

That is not your fault. You are not alone. And you don’t have to be a victim.

What is your unmet need? Or out of alignment? What needs healing? 
I am not your guru, I don’t have all the answers.

But I know that you have within you the answers. You knew it all along. And they are not the default quick-fixes.

life coaching in action

The quick-fixes that fit comfortably into your existing worldview validate your current mindset and methods which are themselves a part of the problem. Because they missed the deeper truth.

Sometimes it is necessary to step back with humility to spend time observing and focusing on your body-mind, in order to ask the right questions.

A life coaching session creates that condition to invite just such deep personal inquiry. Giving it as much time as it needs and letting it unfold in its due time. It’s an intentional practice of trust and letting go.

This may just be what you need to get started.

It is going to be a process, but you deserve to be your best self NOW

And as your life coach, I will meet you where you are and be with you every step of the way. 

Let’s get some answers. Find and meet your real needs. Address misalignment to your core values. And bring healings to to traumas.

“We can think of development as an ongoing process of transcending our identities, and including them in a new and more expansive way of being in the world.”  – Doug Silsbee

What to expect

The sessions will take place either in person or via a virtual meeting space such as FaceTime, Skype or Zoom.

Every session is a unique co-creating experience that can never be reproduced or recreated. 

While it follows a half structure, in practice the direction we go depends on what serves you and what you need in this present moment. That is to say it always evolves with you.

In the sessions we cultivate a coaching relationship that is open and safe; where you can be seen, understood and heard.

coaching session structure

Life coaching session structure

1. We begin by managing ourselves, calming down and detaching from anything that distract us to bring ourselves fully into this space.

2. Next we work side-by-side to both distill down and clarify your goals. 

3. Thus we let the coaching process unfold spontaneously to bring awareness and new perspective. 

4. Next as equals we plan and strategize realistic, attainable and measurable actions to set you up for success. 

5. Finally, we can identify what supports you need to follow through with the actions.

Additionally in between sessions, if so desired, I can be your additional support to keep you honest. 

My promise: You will always be treated as the expert of yourself: creative, resourceful and whole. 

I am not your guru and do not desire to be. I am there to support and to walk with you. 

When appropriate, and with permission, my expertise and experience could also be available to you.

Ultimately, we partner to find what you need to feel your best, and live a life true to your values; full of vitality and meanings. 

I am here to support you to be the best version of yourself.

Why does life coaching work?

Primordial programming, social conditioning, plus childhood traumas act as the gatekeepers to all the subconscious information that are embodied within us.

A life coaching session re-creates the conditions that bypass the cognitive barrier, mining raw data straight from the somatic intelligence in the body which then can be transformed into invaluable insights for clarity and alchemized.

What is that in layman's terms? Your body and your mind are governed by a set of automated, invisible rules that are designed to protect you.

But sometimes it goes against what you have in between your ears.

A life coaching session is an intentional space where you can be temporarily impervious to your stories and their limitations.

There lies the opportunity to focus on, be aware of, and to notice what your cognitive mind is incapable of.

It is there you may find the missing pieces to your puzzle.

"Patience means allowing things to unfold at their own speed rather than jumping in with your habitual response to either pain or pleasure. The real happiness that underlies both gloriousness and wretchedness often gets short-circuited by our jumping too fast into the same habitual pattern." Pema Chödrön

How do I coach?

Life coaching is distinct from other helping modalities in that it is an equal partnership and focuses on moving forward.

A coaching relationship doesn’t create dependency. If a life coach became a guru, the source of inspiration and energy, what happens when the coaching relationship ends?

Often this leaves the client falling right back into the same behavioral loop. In contrast a coach helps the client’s process of self-enabling.

The International Coach Federation (ICF) describes client’s self-enabling beautifully in their core coaching competencies:

The end goal of coaching is to “develop the client’s ability to make decisions, address key concerns, and develop himself/herself (to get feedback, to determine priorities and set the pace of learning, to reflect on and learn from experiences).”

It is a poor business model to be so effective that my clients won’t need me anymore because they have all the tools they need to replicate and consolidate success going forward.

That’s why to me, this is not a business (where profit is the end goal); this is a practice, where client’s empowerment and self-actualization is the goal.

Click here to learn more about what coaching is NOT.

"Be a lamp for yourselves. Be your own refuge. Seek for no other. All things must pass. Strive on diligently. Don’t give up.” The Buddha’s last words were, “Be your own light.”

More about Personal Development and Life Coaching

"The most basic and powerful way to connect to another person is to listen. Just listen. Perhaps the most important thing we ever give each other is our attention…. A loving silence often has far more power to heal and to connect than the most well-intentioned words." Rachel Naomi Remen

The session may be that safe space you've always craved but are largely deprived of.

A space we co-create in full dedication to you being seen and heard as the whole person that you are.

Confidentiality and trust are non-negotiable. Where there is nothing to prove and no room for judgement.

We leave pre-conceived notions and real-time sense making at the door to enter into this space called Presence.

It becomes a context for us to deeply realize the impermanence and timelessness of time and space.

I am there to uphold the integrity of this space and listen to you.

And you play, experiment, enquire, explore and just be.

 

i am a coach